I frequent a few local restaurants whenever I can. Sure, the cuisine is certainly a primary attraction, but it is matched by being recognized as a frequent guest. When restaurant staff members welcome you back as an old friend, it generates an incredible amount of goodwill. Food may nourish our bodies, but relationships nourish our soul. The same is true for meetings and conferences. Educational sessions fill our minds, but it is the spirit of community extended by our professional "family" that fills our hearts. A sense of community can only happen when meeting professionals see themselves - like restaurateurs - as being in the hospitality business. I believe successful restaurateur Danny Meyer provides some lessons for our industry in his compelling book, Setting the Table.

"A business that doesn't understand its raison d'être as fostering community will inevitably underperform."
Too many meetings are merely in the information delivery business. The ones that stand out are those in which the organizers recognize their role in connecting individuals to the people, ideas, information, and resources they need to realize their aspirations. We must become more intentional about how we help individuals connect with each other at our meetings so that they develop professional relationships that will sustain them, long after the event concludes.

"We want as many of our guests as possible to be proud to identify themselves with our restaurants."
Are your meeting participants proud to associate themselves with your events? When regulars take pride in their restaurant of choice, they want to contribute to its success, not only by being frequent patrons, but by recommending the establishment to friends and family. They offer constructive feedback that they might not otherwise have shared. They hold the restaurant to incredibly high standards, but are generous with understanding when inevitable hiccups occur. Are your meeting regulars doing the same for you?
"The excellence reflex is a natural reaction to fix something that isn't right, or to improve something that could be better. The excellence reflex is rooted in instinct and upbringing, and then constantly honed through awareness, caring, and practice." This "excellence reflex," which Meyer attributes to Chef Michael Romano, can rarely be taught. You have to hire for it and create a team of committed professionals (and volunteers) whose individual commitment to excellence creates a group capacity for high achievement that make your meetings meaningful and memorable.

The most important lesson I learned from my first restaurant job as a high school sophomore was that the waiters who made the most tips and got the most requests to be seated in their section were the ones who genuinely liked serving others. This distinction between service and hospitality is at the core of Meyer's many restaurant successes. "Service is the technical delivery of a product. Hospitality is how the delivery of that product makes its recipient feel." He goes on to suggest that service is a monologue and hospitality is a dialogue.

When our meeting logistics run smoothly, we have merely provided good service. While incredibly necessary, it is not a sufficient indicator of success. Only when we act with genuine hospitality and foster a sense of true community can we hope to turn first-timers into regulars, and regulars into proud participants in our events. 

°Jeffrey Cufaude is a former higher education administrator, meeting planner, and association executive. He currently writes, speaks, and facilitates on a variety of individual and organizational leadership issues. Learn more about his work at www.ideaarchitects.org. To submit topic ideas and feedback on the Leading Learning column, e-mail jeffrey@ideaarchitects.org. Convene's Leading Learning series is sponsored by AVW TELAV. Visit its Web site at www.avwtelav.com.